
How can I help someone who is
experiencing abuse?
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You can help by:
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believing her
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listening and letting her talk about her feelings
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talking with her about what she might do to plan for her safety
and that of her children and helping her seek medical and/or police
assistance if she or the children have been physically abused -
helping her to understand the good things about herself and her children
-
learning more about partner abuse and knowing the key resources in the
community and how to contact them -
respecting the person's confidentiality
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giving a clear message that violence is never okay or justifiable
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letting her know that she did not cause it, is not to blame for the abuse,
nor can she change her partner's behaviour
Don't:
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tell her what to do, when to leave or when not to leave
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tell her to go back to the situation and try a little harder
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suggest that you talk to her partner to try and straighten things out
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tell her she should stay for the sake of the children
What to Look For:
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your friend is reluctant to talk about why they are sad, anxious, or depressed
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use of pills or more drinking to calm their nerves
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physical injuries or hiding injuries (eg: long sleeves in the middle of summer)
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your friend avoids contact with you, cuts your time together short, or makes up excuses at the last minute for not being able to see you
Your friend's first step:
Contact the Crisis Line or a Safe Shelter in her area. We are available 24 hours a day, 365 days a year to help.
Take care of yourself:
Helping someone in an abusive relationship can be stressful. Never confront the abuser. Talk with a professional about your feelings and reactions to the situation. Look after your own physical and emotional well-being so you can support your friend.
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